What it's like to have Tourette's - and how music gives me back control | Esha Alwani

  • Published on Apr 23, 2019
  • Esha Alwani began writing songs when she was six years old, shortly after being diagnosed with Tourette syndrome. And she noticed something amazing: whenever she played music, her involuntary tics suddenly went away. Listen along as Alwani explores the power of music and delights the audience with an ethereal performance of her piano ballad "I'm Not Loving You (My Mask)."
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Comments • 391

  • Tourettes Education Live it , love it , Tic it !

    Wear your TS lightly . Let it lay gently across your shoulders and settle as part of you .
    Love this lady and love her music 🤗

  • Thicc SANDwich
    Thicc SANDwich Day ago

    Me: *this whole video*

  • BeckyYellowGirl
    BeckyYellowGirl 10 days ago

    Awesome voice!!!!

  • Akim Joocelyn
    Akim Joocelyn 25 days ago

    hmm she should get a record deal

  • frederik ahle
    frederik ahle Month ago

    Music is the closest we've come to magic

  • riley s.
    riley s. Month ago

    she's such a great singer!! wow!

  • Amy Pdiddy
    Amy Pdiddy Month ago

    Omg she’s amazing ❤️❤️❤️

  • RanByMonkeys
    RanByMonkeys Month ago

    It's people like this that make me feel like there is a chance for humanity to survive. It does really show you how powerful the human brain is.

  • Priscilla Pappaterra

    I'm crying.

  • Bobbie Hostetler
    Bobbie Hostetler 2 months ago

    What an amazing story. Your music made me cry it was so beautiful. So are you - you are a gift! Thank you!

  • Peggy Miller
    Peggy Miller 2 months ago

    You are a beautiful spirit and you will never know how many people you have encouraged with your TED talk. You also have a lovely voice and talent. Thank you so much!

  • Michael L
    Michael L 2 months ago

    Her story was touching. She has a strong spirit and a fantastic voice!

  • gregory Brown
    gregory Brown 2 months ago

    Cursed with disorder but blessed with attractiveness.

  • Gertrud Durtrek
    Gertrud Durtrek 2 months ago

    She is so sweet and have a lot of power ❤ amazing persian girl

  • KiddMartian96
    KiddMartian96 2 months ago

    I think the sound is cute

  • Reece Mcneil
    Reece Mcneil 3 months ago

    It's fantastic that music helps, no doubt about that but... Am I the only one who thought the singing wasn't good?

  • Holdyour Plums
    Holdyour Plums 3 months ago

    Not a single tic when she sings. Amazing.

  • The Bedrocker
    The Bedrocker 3 months ago

    Beautiful voice, brave young woman! Namaste

  • Peter Panino
    Peter Panino 3 months ago +2

    It's called FLOW.

  • Juan Juantreas
    Juan Juantreas 3 months ago


  • Spicy
    Spicy 4 months ago +1

    Music is great, wait til you try Cannabis with high CBD, low THC content.

    WE ARE LEGION 4 months ago +1

    Brave girl , bless her heart

  • R Gerard
    R Gerard 4 months ago +1

    Awesome inspiring video, Esha. Music was and is still my greatest therapy through a myriad of health issues too numerous to name. You are very lucky your Mother was there for you and tried something other than drugs. You have a beautiful, natural voice. I'll watch for your album soon!

  • GodKingVivec
    GodKingVivec 4 months ago

    Yeah... good luck Esha, I'll tell you, I have symptoms extremly similar to yours, its going to get worse as you get older. Mine started simple, but it evolved and increased. And music doesnt help me either. Maybe when I was young. I went through high school with mine too... And my God watching you triggers mine too, watching other people with tourettes, its contagious like yawning. Every time I see other people twitch or have tics i makes mine flare up. I cant even get the benefits of dopamine like you do either, at least not easily. The ritalin and adderall i believe is what gave me my tics. It also stunted the motivation center of my brain. I have the nucleus accumbens of a 6-8 year old. Im 29 now. I thrash so much that the back of my neck has had an infected friction burn for over a decade, i have carpal tunnel syndrome from the thrashing of my arms and hands, i nearly trip over my own feet from both the neck thrashing throwing my balance off and from my legs suddenly wanting to do a double step.

  • Mr. Derek Gets it!
    Mr. Derek Gets it! 4 months ago

    THE COLUMBINE SHOOTERS MOM GETS A CLIP. That loser should be jailed! No comments allowed so I'll leave a comment on every video! DO NOT CELEBRATE LOSER PARENTS THAT STOOD IN THE WAY OF HELP, when parents are responsible for their kids actions then we will see less death! SICKENING TO APPLAUD COLUMBINES SHOOTERS MOM SHAME,

  • Morgan Fears
    Morgan Fears 4 months ago +2

    Thank you so much for sharing your story with us!

  • James Battles
    James Battles 4 months ago +1


  • Tung Bui
    Tung Bui 4 months ago


  • Eduard Stancu
    Eduard Stancu 4 months ago

    Penguin tourette.

  • Dean Hamlin
    Dean Hamlin 4 months ago +1

    Wow, who knew music could do that.. great song and singing.. great kid.

  • Jeremy Metcalf
    Jeremy Metcalf 4 months ago +12

    What I'm more impressed with is the overwhelming amount of positive comments. Stay classy RUclip.

  • skelton1623
    skelton1623 4 months ago +4

    How anyone can thumbs down is crazy!!

  • never
    never 4 months ago +3

    this is amazing ❤️ you have a wonderful voice both in singing and in speech
    this is why i love ted talks- they show me the most amazing people

  • mmisbach
    mmisbach 4 months ago +2

    6 year old girl turns to medicinal music for Tourette syndrome relief. Music has the power to physiological affect our bodies. She composes music, but realized that music is what composed her. #TedTalk twitter.com/tedstalkin

  • anK
    anK 4 months ago +2

    Music is a remedy to a lot of things... What a nice story she told us. Keep fighting !

  • Elias Huomala
    Elias Huomala 4 months ago +1

    her hiccup/tic sounds like a bird and its kind of cute not going to lie

    • Elias Huomala
      Elias Huomala 4 months ago +1

      @ESHA music oh wow you replied to my comment, you're welcome and have a great day! 😁

    • ESHA music
      ESHA music 4 months ago +1

      lol thank you!

  • I'm not Okay
    I'm not Okay 4 months ago +2

    The little tics she did were freaking adorable

  • MrLaTEchno Reality,Stop Fake News.

    Sound, therefore, vibration makes me think that the brain accepts it and passes it on to the body. Playing together like an orchestra
    Researching this example would not be a bad idea in my opinion.
    Respect for this lady and her perseverance in wanting to solve her problems herself .... no matter what.
    Go you girl think positive and your solution will come!
    [sorry for the bad grammar]

    TRIPPLE JAY 4 months ago +3

    W🤩W what a voice. Thank you for sharing your condition.

  • timothèe chalamet
    timothèe chalamet 4 months ago +1

    I wonder if that's permanent

    • ESHA music
      ESHA music 4 months ago

      It is. Tourette Syndrome is a permanent condition with no cure

  • Stuart Glover
    Stuart Glover 4 months ago +2

    Wow! I needn't say anymore.

  • mindworks
    mindworks 4 months ago

    I wonder how long this syndrome has been around? It's amazing how many of these types of disorder exist.

  • Nichole Seitz
    Nichole Seitz 4 months ago +2

    Really brilliant girl

  • Eduardo Hinojosa
    Eduardo Hinojosa 4 months ago +2

    Damn, that's one pro composer!!!

  • Greekmythdude Gaming
    Greekmythdude Gaming 4 months ago +1

    5dccc i unigt. Uhuiyhg. Ifiytgjuhjbgjuvfb jj. Jj. H. H. B. H. B. B. B. B

  • Philip Serino
    Philip Serino 4 months ago +5

    This was suuuuuper encouraging! Wow!

    • Philip Serino
      Philip Serino 4 months ago

      ESHA music keep being a bright shining light, the world needs people like you!

    • ESHA music
      ESHA music 4 months ago +1

      I'm so glad you thought so!

  • DrEsquizoide
    DrEsquizoide 4 months ago +4

    Amazing and touching

  • Stephen Mason
    Stephen Mason 4 months ago +4

    She is perfect exactly as she is! Her music is beautiful

  • Douglas Kelban
    Douglas Kelban 4 months ago +3

    You are brave, helping others, and beautiful.

  • Andreik's Vlogs
    Andreik's Vlogs 4 months ago +2

    Hey Esha ! Have a great day !

  • Chillwave General
    Chillwave General 4 months ago +3

    She is beautiful girl and amazing singer

  • Chris Beard
    Chris Beard 4 months ago +2

    Beautiful in every sense of the word ❤️

  • otaku overload
    otaku overload 4 months ago +3

    She gives me hope

  • ?
    ? 4 months ago

    Pommes 🍟

  • Canal THP
    Canal THP 4 months ago

    Gosh, this speech and the song at the end...

  • crossclaim1
    crossclaim1 4 months ago +1

    Wonderful young lady!

  • rodman 74
    rodman 74 4 months ago +3

    Beautiful person, beautiful message

  • Latter Reign
    Latter Reign 4 months ago +1

    What a great song ❤️✨

    • ESHA music
      ESHA music 4 months ago

      Thanks ! The song is called "I'm not loving you (my mask)" and is available on all streaming platforms if you're interested !

  • Poland Ball
    Poland Ball 4 months ago +4

    You can see how it gets worse in stressful conditions.

  • Jebb McDoodle
    Jebb McDoodle 4 months ago

    I chuckled... Beautiful...