Hey Steve: The Friend’s Wife Causes Problems || STEVE HARVEY

  • Published on Apr 22, 2019
  • She’s been friends with a man for over 10 years, and now his wife is causing problems. Should she expect him to defend their friendship?
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Comments • 769

  • kgoldmon
    kgoldmon 4 hours ago

    "The Friend's Wife Causes Problems"? uh no, more like "The Husband's Friend Causes Problems for the Wife"

  • Kevin A.
    Kevin A. 2 days ago

    It's over sis 😂 until you get married too or something

  • Carleen-Mariee
    Carleen-Mariee 6 days ago

    I feel like the comments in here are a little harsh. I Defo agree, okay it’s his wife so she should fall back, but imagine having a bestfriend for years that’s become family and you genuinely don’t see them in an form of romantic way and then because the wife in my opinion is insecure, you lose that friendship. I see it from both perspectives🤷🏾‍♀️. My question is, does that wife have any guy friends? Has she been allowed to keep them? Hmmm and if the shoe was switched would the reaction be the same. I don’t know

  • Sparkle LovesYou
    Sparkle LovesYou 7 days ago

    Ppl are crazy... You have no place inn their marriage period. No way to get around that. I had a platonic relationship with a friend and he got married and his wife wouldn't meet me and didn't want me around I told him that he had to honor her wishes. No one comes before your wife/husband. If she was a true friend she would understand that. If she was a real woman with pure intentions she wouldn't press the issue and respectfully back off like she would want a woman to do if she were someone's wife.

  • Chuna G
    Chuna G 11 days ago

    Bye girl

  • Vreanna Renee
    Vreanna Renee 13 days ago

    No ma'am leave them alone. You are not above his wife.

  • Tonice Mon’a
    Tonice Mon’a 14 days ago


  • Rondellius Linthicumis

    My niece was married and she had several men as friends!. Her husband did not care because
    they we all just friends and he knew this!. He never ever had a problem with her Male friends!.

  • TMac473
    TMac473 14 days ago

    I’d love to hear Steve’s advice if the sexes were reversed. So many women think it’s ok to have a male “friend”. Hypocrisy 101

  • ams30393
    ams30393 14 days ago

    Trust me. You are going to be 60 still not married, waiting for him. Why would you go to such length of having an altercation with wife over her husband you call friend? Why do you want the husband to be between your fights? Leave them alone and find a husband. Never fight with this woman. She is right. You were friends. Accept that the friendship is over. Move on even to a different city. Moving on is easier that way. Goodness. My 6th sense is telling me the friendship is more. One is lying to the other.

  • j Pat
    j Pat 16 days ago

    I had a male friend like that. I just faded into the background. This girl ain't got enough sense to do the same.

  • plum 777
    plum 777 16 days ago

    No, thank you 😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • reggie paramoure
    reggie paramoure 16 days ago

    This is a very sensitive topic in monogamous relationships. I believe the husband should have an open conversation with his wife to gain clarity on the situation. If in the conversation the wife reveals being uncomfortable with the situation with legit reason then as husband you must set the necessary boundaries with your female friend. If she’s a true friend she’ll understand and play her part but if she’s not she’ll disappear like the rest of your fake friends.

  • MrsAmayaKobe
    MrsAmayaKobe 16 days ago +2

    👩🏽 if you don’t take a seat and wait on your on man 👌🏿👌🏿👌🏿💯💯💯

  • tshireletso khumalo
    tshireletso khumalo 16 days ago

    Handling it respectfully would've been to leave 'em alone...

  • Sha
    Sha 16 days ago

    For once i disagree with steeve if is a friends from a very long time like a bff because me i do believe in male and female friendship most of women who dont like female around day they still have a male friend (bff) 😒

  • Efua Abok
    Efua Abok 17 days ago

    Very well spoken lady

    NANO BOT 17 days ago


  • True Real Pearl
    True Real Pearl 18 days ago

    Why do people take so long to get to their question?!?

  • Jae Jae
    Jae Jae 19 days ago

    Steve’s so smart. Love his directness

  • T.C. Harris-Durrant
    T.C. Harris-Durrant 20 days ago

    Why do females always quote years when talking about a friend. So many of you all don't respect the friend zone go away.. You think way too highly of yourself like he supposed choose you. Get over yourself. Know your place and move on.

  • naturally_blessing
    naturally_blessing 20 days ago

    I love how she tried to articulate that well. Psshhh. Honey, wake up. You are 'the other woman' that every Wife hates. Goodbye.

  • Mariana Estrada-Salas

    I'm glad when my friends got married, we were all friends way before so we all hang out and there's nothing awkward no jealousy, nothing. I can hug my guy friends, sit next to them, joke around with them and their wives won't be mad because they're my friends too. We've all known each other 10+ years.

  • Charlene Dukes
    Charlene Dukes 21 day ago

    Girllllll You Got Nerve!!! Please MOVE ON..You NOT A VICTIM!🙄

  • V
    V 21 day ago

    she wants her friend to have her back against his own wife 😂😂😂

    VIP TEAM 22 days ago +4

    He picked the wife for a reason. Your friendship wasnt good enough to marry, just accept it.

  • jamey smith
    jamey smith 22 days ago

    She doesnt have a man.shes stupid as hell and lonely

  • Emily W
    Emily W 23 days ago

    I love when steve gets brutally honest.

  • Iyinoluwa O
    Iyinoluwa O 23 days ago +1

    Some of my mum's closest friends are guys, my dad is good friends with them now too (they go on guys trips together) & my mum does day trips with their wives but even when single, neither parent cut off the other's friends, just made friends with them as well. When everyone knows their place and the friendship is platonic, it can work. My parents still put each other first before even us kids and after God alone and their friend's respect that and do the same.

  • Anasco KLA-US
    Anasco KLA-US 23 days ago

    Obviously she is single, that's the bottom line. I completely understand the wife. So sad for this pretty young lady.

  • no online harrassment
    no online harrassment 23 days ago

    "the wife" she can't be that close with the famly like an aunt if she refers to her friend's wife as " the wife". That just rubbed me wrong. She obviously can't stand her. Move on and don't look back.

  • Myrabel Gbe
    Myrabel Gbe 23 days ago +3

    The fact that all y’all are ok with people being forced to lose friendships because of marriage is so weird, it’s no supposed to be that way

  • RubyRim
    RubyRim 23 days ago +1

    Selfish as hell! This is why I start reducing my communication with my guy friends the minute they get married. I can't have anyone disrespecting me.

    ANIRT MCQUETE GARCIA 23 days ago

    I dont understand girls / wives doing this. I understand distance and not being this close but how can you destroy a 10 year friendship? I doubt she'll do the same if her husband saids that wife cant be friends with this girl.

  • Adwoa Dadson
    Adwoa Dadson 24 days ago

    Back off girl
    He is married

  • Asnate bedi
    Asnate bedi 24 days ago

    i dont need to be married coz i dont need this type of drama

  • Ms Lavender
    Ms Lavender 24 days ago

    Move on and stay out of their marriage - that includes, throwing shade at your "best friend's wife" on national television by referring to her as "the wife" and putting their marriage on blast before the world is not only disrespectful to your best friend and his wife; also, to their marriage. The best thing for you to do is honor your best friend's wife's request completely and respectfully - stay out of their marriage. Let it be and let it go. If they want you in their lives, they would reach out to you. Until that day comes, move with your life.

  • Lara Spencer
    Lara Spencer 24 days ago

    I think she’s having a hard time realizing she’s not number one anymore. They’re still friends but under the wife’s conditions and that’s how it’s gone be.... on the other hand women should stop being so insecure when it comes to men having relationships with other women.. if you trust your man then trust him because at the end of the day he’s going to do what he wants to do and there’s nothing you can say or do to control the outcome. I say let them be friends but homegirl need to know that she’s not number one and stay in her lane

  • steffany G
    steffany G 24 days ago

    There's no such thing as a man and women being just friends. Just doesnt work that way. Women need to stop playing stupid and start acting like Queens.

  • Royal Jewel
    Royal Jewel 24 days ago

    Have a hard time believing in male/female friendships. He married a woman who was his #1. It wasn’t her, find another “friend”.

  • Marcus Wroten
    Marcus Wroten 24 days ago

    Why put a bunch of silly preventive measures in place if they're going to cheat they're going to cheat there's nothing you can do about it so just deal with it when it happens insecurities kills many relationships just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean you're dead maybe they're friends because he talks to her about what's going on in their relationship women forget sometimes y'all are very hard to talk to so we need an outside ear so that we know how to deal with you just my opinion however

  • Marcus Wroten
    Marcus Wroten 24 days ago

    Dude is punk why should Ace his friend of a decade because of his wife in security personally I would put my foot down and she would just have to deal with it it's not like they're screwing or anyting she's just naturally insecure this is ridiculous I can see if she was a new friend or hot coworker or something like that then I would understand the wife asked what she is just incredibly Petty and insecure

  • PublicSpeaking202
    PublicSpeaking202 25 days ago

    She messy!! She has EVERY RIGHT to put this MESSY WOMAN IN Her place.
    HE'S MARRIED!!! She over there trying to play GOOD FRIEND! B$&# PLEASE!! We see thru all that. FAKKKE!!!

  • Lydia Land
    Lydia Land 25 days ago

    How stupid can you be, girl please, MOVE ON

  • Haydee Johnson
    Haydee Johnson 25 days ago +1

    WHAT THE WHAT!!!!?????
    Girrrrrrlllllll, keep it moving. Find yourself a husband of your own.

  • Bowingbear CEO
    Bowingbear CEO 25 days ago

    She never said they didn't have "a history" tho... 🤔😉

  • Rodie N.A.O.
    Rodie N.A.O. 25 days ago

    How stupid could she be?

  • Kristy Kabui
    Kristy Kabui 25 days ago +3

    Please, girl wake up, you didn't even need to ask Steve, it's sheer commonsense..he's not your brother, they not your nephews /nieces, he's married now, so stay away..Period..mother hen is protecting herself and family.

  • JungKooksMom
    JungKooksMom 25 days ago +8

    Ooof. She came on live tv to talk about this man and his wife ... sit and think about that . Says a lot lol

  • Roderick Sears
    Roderick Sears 25 days ago

    The wife probably was uncomfortable because the friend looked better than her so she felt threatened so she destroyed that friendship on purpose because if the friend was unattractive the wife wouldn't have cared.

  • Mzdynamitee
    Mzdynamitee 25 days ago

    That's so sad . People cannot have platonic friendships when they are in a relationship. What a lonely life

  • writerspen010
    writerspen010 25 days ago +1

    Looking through the comments, I feel like I'm the only one with a problem with how her guy friend handled the situation. Obviously the dynamic was going to change once he married, but they're still best friends. Your friends don't go away just because you're in a serious relationship or get married. I don't feel like there was enough context to explain why her friend's wife was rude. I assume she saw this woman as being too present, and possibly being a threat to her married (i.e. suspecting her husband had or could have developed feelings for this woman), but without more information about the instances when his new wife was rude to her, to me this reads as the wife being controlling about who her husband's friends are. Men and women can just be friends, and if nothing's happened between this woman and her guy friend after ten+ years of friendship, the wife shouldn't have anything to be worried about to the point where she is driving her husband's closest friends away.

  • Judzel Riley
    Judzel Riley 25 days ago

    The wife is so insecure

  • Pesi Belau
    Pesi Belau 25 days ago

    My uncle's wife told one his closed friend to stay away from her husband. When the friend went to complain to him about it, my uncle response was: it is her right as his wife to make that decision.

  • Marshay H
    Marshay H 25 days ago +1

    Agree with Steve

  • 0009jerseygirl
    0009jerseygirl 25 days ago +1

    I see Steve's point. However, I have a Male friend I've known for 40 years who is now married and we are still friends. The difference is his wife is not insecure and she and I are also friends. The relationship doesn't have to end because he got married. The wife's insecurity caused it to happen.

  • Darling B
    Darling B 25 days ago

    Does she lowkey want her husband 🙄??? He's married now she should get her own life or her own man

  • Lisa Remer
    Lisa Remer 25 days ago

    Wait til she's married and hubby carries his female friends along. Ha Ha. I've had a guy friend and when his wife felt threatened I stepped aside. In time we all became friends but you gotta walk and let it go where it goes 😃

  • Lisa Remer
    Lisa Remer 25 days ago +1

    Right on Steve!!!!

  • Oghogho Imariagbe
    Oghogho Imariagbe 26 days ago

    I understand the wife's perspective but there's always a way to handle situations without being rude to someone else. She could have just told her straight up.

  • baby joedy
    baby joedy 26 days ago

    Bye Felicia! You are not necessary.

    • Chasiraw
      Chasiraw 8 days ago

      baby joedy 😲👏

  • T C
    T C 26 days ago +3

    I'D LOVE to see the telephone call log of who was calling who in this friendship???? Ya hear me?

  • Jazmenn Ijeoma-Ihechu
    Jazmenn Ijeoma-Ihechu 26 days ago +1

    I agree 100% with steve

  • T C
    T C 26 days ago

    He has 2 kids she considers nephews!!!??? PSYCHO!!

  • T C
    T C 26 days ago

    UGLY N DESPERATE talking on a national TV show because the cute wife got the catch!

  • T C
    T C 26 days ago


  • T C
    T C 26 days ago


  • synchronicity676
    synchronicity676 26 days ago

    Feel bad for her though...after all they childhood friends.. best years together, n then to feel he not supporting her on watever be d situation bet d wife n her...
    I don't see a man giving up his male friends for d wife so why in such albeit, rare relationship, shld he? In her case, she cut d rel but im sure she hurt waaaay more..it's like a betrayal from a friend who won't stand up for u..
    Don't think husband wife relationship should be a form to control d other.. it seems like wife doin tat..
    I hope he does at least talk to this lady friend privately n explain his thoughts on it ..all d Best 💜

  • Ladi Dodi
    Ladi Dodi 26 days ago

    I hear Steve and understand what he's saying but all it sounds like is a bunch of insecurity.
    I would be HIGHLY upset if I started dating someone and made them aware of any and all close relationships in my life and he lie about being cool with it all.
    I am married, for 12 yrs now, and I have a close friend who is like a brother to me. I told my then boyfriend (now husband) that he is one of my very close friends and nothubg went on between us. We all hung out together frequently and both my husband and friend hung out one on one countless times. My friend even calls him and chats with him regularly.
    My husband has expressed after many years that he wasnt comfortable becausw he is still a guy but I told him nothing is going on AT ALL and I don't want to cut really close friends out my life.
    I feel if he decided to tell me he wants it to be cut off, that is a form of emotional abuse. That is totally not cool.
    A spouse is suppose to add to your life, not take away from your life unless its taking away stress and worry.

  • Ms. Rae
    Ms. Rae 26 days ago +2

    For the most part I agree with Mr. Harvey's advice right here. My only question is if the shoe were on the other foot and she was a wife to someone would she be afforded the same respect if she had a problem with her husband having a female friend???????...or would she be told she was "insecure" or needed to "be more mature"??? I believe in giving respect as long as I will be recieving it as well. I am all about that 2 way street.

  • FilMAD Camp
    FilMAD Camp 26 days ago +8

    🤣🤣🤣 @ the woman shaking her head in the back after this lady asked the question. She was already like "Nope".

  • Natasha Williams
    Natasha Williams 26 days ago +4

    Her immaturity is showing. Men and women are not friends, period. I don't care how platonic one may believe it to be, it's all b.s.. And if the man fights for you, you get to have him.

    • DeAndre
      DeAndre 26 days ago +1

      Exactly. Usually, one the sexes wanted to date the other but couldn't and then settled for the friend zone. They've usually kissed or had sex but will lie and say its been platonic for 10 years. Anybody who allows their significant other to have a bestfriend of the opposite sex around deserves what's coming to them.

  • ANewDay2007
    ANewDay2007 26 days ago +6

    This lady is thinking like a single woman, which she is. Her tune will change one day when she meets her husband. And HE has a long time friendship with a woman - platonic or not.

    • Special K
      Special K 26 days ago +2

      Agreed..that is what I am saying what people fail to realize... they only "think" the other person is cool with it because the said other person knows better than to think it's a cool deal... but let it happen to them... it's a whole other ball game... my ex had me cut off guy friends all the while he got to hold onto to his friend girls and had the NERVE to tell me to trust him.. the irony.. but long-story short that's the many many reasons why I do not believe in the opposite-sex friendships cause turns out the guys I was friends with wanted to be with me and my ex's best friend girl wanted him and we were in constant turmoil, confusion, and complications... no thank you for me... leave that to the kids before (emphasis on BEFORE) them hormones kick in... people are really fooling themselves if they think opposite-sex friendships can last a lifetime... the only thing I want to last a lifetime without complications, turmoil, and confusion is my marriage with my future husband and of course my friendships with WOMEN... #ijs #beentheredonethatnotgoingback

  • Tomara Doss
    Tomara Doss 26 days ago +2


  • gunslingah2
    gunslingah2 26 days ago +4

    Steve is so right! Homegirl knows what’s up and the Mrs isn’t having it.
    A good friend of mine just got married for the 2nd time. We were friends throughout his first marriage (she was cool but stepped outside their marriage). His new wife is a really nice lady but I can tell she’s not feeling this friendship even though she smiles and performs. It’s a feeling we women get. Her poor husband is clueless while he’s steadily chatting away. But as a woman, I respect her position and her boundaries.
    So I’m just happy for dude. She did invite me to the wedding though lol.

    • T C
      T C 26 days ago

      U need to move on....she gon snatch ya wig if u dont find ur place!

  • ItsMe Gold
    ItsMe Gold 26 days ago +5

    🙄 and I'm not the wife. Bye Felicia....he don't need no bff, he found his bff when he got his wife. Go have your feelings hurt somewhere else. She made herself too important and is the disrespectful one believing he needs to adjust his wife...smh 🤡🤦🏼‍♀️

  • soulstrenth crusader
    soulstrenth crusader 27 days ago +1

    Steve said no no no...thank you! She probably brought some things back to mind for him from past relationships. He's learned the lesson. When people make life changes, the dynamic of other relationships tend to change. She has to abide by the tone the wife sets...even if the wife's insecurity is showing. She the WIFE. Since the wife was disrespectful, she did right by pulling away from the both of them, because the husband can't check her, even on a level of being disrespectful, because it will turn into "oh you're on HER side now???" He doesn't need that attitude in his home. Now in my case, I'm very good friends with the husband, I knew him before I knew her. He introduced us. I talk to his wife constantly and she is one of my best friends. But she's not insecure at all and I know how to stay out of people's relationship. Now if she asks me for some lady knowledge about whatever, I give her my truth and I'm always there for her. We love and respect each other.

  • Yas Ba
    Yas Ba 27 days ago

    Is this some wierd American thing... can't spouse talk to each other honestly.. she said they like brother sister... lot of insecurity..shows in the Presidency that's for sure..

  • NaturalsRock.com
    NaturalsRock.com 27 days ago +9

    again... GIRL B-Y-E!!!! Find some single male "friends"


  • NaturalsRock.com
    NaturalsRock.com 27 days ago +2

    GIRL B-Y-E!!!!

  • B Grwl
    B Grwl 27 days ago +2

    Steve spoke exactly on point.

  • Lean
    Lean 27 days ago +3

    🤣🤣🤣🤣i love Steve, he said no thank u

  • Fabulous
    Fabulous 27 days ago +1

    She's an idiot... she needs to get lost....she so lost..

  • PlanB-TV
    PlanB-TV 27 days ago +4

    That would ruined His home if he confronted his woman over his friends.

    • PlanB-TV
      PlanB-TV 25 days ago

      +T C Hahaha it will definitely not end well.

    • T C
      T C 26 days ago +1

      Yep definite fistfight! Cops called n all that!

  • Carenique Turner
    Carenique Turner 27 days ago

    I wondering if everyone with these mean comments really listened? I could've sworn she said that she has in fact severed the friendship already...

  • Maranatha Georges
    Maranatha Georges 27 days ago

    That's what Gabrielle Union say with Wade ...hummmm

  • Andri Ramirez
    Andri Ramirez 27 days ago +4

    He's married maam, wth stay away , y'all relationship will never be the same. Take the L and go, you're not his sister! you should know that by that age lol

  • Kindah
    Kindah 27 days ago

    If this was a man doing it to a woman, it would be called abuse. Also, if the person you're married to is being disrespectful to your friends then you need to have a serious talk with them. I would never marry somebody who is disrespectful to anybody. That wife should have been mature and took her husband aside. She's either a narcissist or she's simply immature. And her husband is immature for Marrying a childish person and not meeting the needs of his wife sooner.

  • Cheryl Murray Goggans
    Cheryl Murray Goggans 27 days ago +6

    You shouldn't expect jack period!!! You must've bumped your head.

  • Rolo Robbins
    Rolo Robbins 27 days ago

    The first sentence that come out of Steve’s mouth confirms exactly why I can’t get married.

  • Solja88
    Solja88 27 days ago

    Awwwww she misses her friend

    • DeAndre
      DeAndre 26 days ago

      More like, she misses the man she couldn't have and settled for the friendzone. 😂

  • Tasha Faaumu
    Tasha Faaumu 27 days ago +2

    This was one the best advices he has given

  • Jennifer Bowman
    Jennifer Bowman 27 days ago +1

    Now if it was a man doing this, this would be considered as “isolation” “abuse” “manipulation” and all the women would be singing a different tune. One thing I do agree with is, if it’s making YOU feel bad, leave it alone girl. Let them live their best toxic life. ESPECIALLY if she’s disrespectful toward you, you’re better off without that friendship.

    • Jennifer Bowman
      Jennifer Bowman 27 days ago

      Andri Ramirez That type of relationship is toxic to me. If you do it because you want to or out of respect for your relationship that’s fine but I’m not gonna do it because my husband told me to. This is a partnership, I’m not your child. That’s just how I see it

    • Jennifer Bowman
      Jennifer Bowman 27 days ago

      Andri Ramirez Protect it from what?.... It doesn’t sound like there was a threat. My job as a woman and your job as a man is to make me feel secure not feed my insecurities, but that’s just how I see things.

    • Andri Ramirez
      Andri Ramirez 27 days ago +1

      no if my husband did this to me i would understand, no need to be hanginh out with anither man that isn't my brother or have blood relatuon to outside of the home. She did what she had to to protect her marriage

  • Mel Cooper
    Mel Cooper 27 days ago

    He have to respect his wife.

  • Sweet Sugar 101
    Sweet Sugar 101 27 days ago +7

    If I'm your wife, you are NOT fixin to be REBUKING me over another woman...no sir ree Bob!!

    • Chasiraw
      Chasiraw 8 days ago

      Sweet Sugar 101 Sips tea 🍵

  • Ni Morris
    Ni Morris 27 days ago +4

    She never mentioned having her own man. The wife made the right move. Wishing the best for her and I feel like she has more than just friendly feelings for the friend.

  • Miss Conceiteality
    Miss Conceiteality 27 days ago +1

    As I do respect Steve’s advice, we all understand husband and wife relationship that works, is to side amongst the marriage over friendships. Can we be more realistic Steve like this woman is being real about just a friendship I’d say as a man who is already taken and in a marriage he can have a damn conversation with his wife about their friendship and if it leads to to it ending then fine but a conversation obviously needed to be had if he cared at all about the friendship. We can’t talk about marriages working because we also have our own hobbies and things going on outside of it if we can’t even talk to our significant other about when things clash. We can’t just have this immediate “well happy wife happy life” with no explanation that sounds like some resentment down the road

  • ❌HEARTìíż🍓
    ❌HEARTìíż🍓 27 days ago +3

    Lady that’s his wife. All friendships don’t last forever. Part ways and continue on with your life!

  • johnathan anthony
    johnathan anthony 27 days ago

    Im sorry but I think this is gonna come back to bite his wife's in the but in the end he lost a close relationship because of her and its going to come up again

  • Maya Zeigler
    Maya Zeigler 27 days ago +1

    Idk man. I have lots of guy friends & it would make me really sad if I had to lose them bc they have insecure wives. My boyfriend doesn’t mind my close guy friends & I feel like if you’re secure enough in your relationship it should be fine. Now if the friend is pushing up or being inappropriate, that’s a different story obviously